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Escaping Lyme – Memory #1
When I feel really horrible, a migraine, nauseated, joint pain, and it is difficult to be here in the “present”, I escape if at all possible into my mind, into my memories. Usually, it is a worthwhile distraction.
When I was a child, my family and I lived in Upstate New York. My parents married young, my mom 19 and my dad was 21 or 22? My father became a high school Physics teacher in a rural New York township and my mom stayed home with us, me, then my two brothers. I think I was a little over a year old when they bought a very old farmhouse. Located on a mountain and accessed by a dirt road, we were isolated as the only family in that area to stay year round. There were other homes up in that area, although one could not see them from our house, but these other places were weekend retreats for New Yorkers who lived in the City. We lived in this house and in this area until I was 12. Most of the memories I like to escape to are from this time period.
Memory #1 Escape – Snow:
Sometimes, when I feel so horrible I like to think about the snow. Yes, of course I romanticize it; I wasn’t the one trying to keep the house heated, or the one trying to get to work. For me, snow was always awesome and amazing. One of the best feelings ever is being outside in the deep, deep cold, the silent, penetrating cold, breathing hot air into the ski mask you have on because breathing in the cold air hurts your lungs. It’s the simultaneousness of breathing in the bitter chill, burning your lungs and nose hairs alike, then breathing out the hot, the hotness of your breath that turns to steam that rises on your cheeks and into your nose.
So snow. After the storm rides through, it becomes an irresistible and impenetrable quiet. All I can hear is the crunching of my moon boots through the crusty topping of the snowdrifts. If I stand for a minute, the silence itself is almost a sound. Some describe it as a blanket, the snow, but more so and for me, snow is a buffer from the outside world. Out in the wintery landscape, one feels enveloped and safe, encapsulated in the moment. Nothing breaks the eloquent silence and you don’t want it to ever end. The closeness. The buffer. The insurmountable quiet.
It’s cold but I am wearing a snowmobile suit. It takes forever to dress this 6 year- old ragamuffin. First, gloves, hat, scarf. Then legs of the suit and slide into the snow boots. Now, arms in, make sure the gloves are tucked into sleeves (this is why we put gloves on first), then zip up. OH. Make sure to go to the bathroom before dressing for outside. We never had ear muffs. Always a ski hat pulled down over the ears and maybe another scarf wrapped around the ears and the nose/mouth.
Heading out into that stillness, that world of endless white, hours of pure fun and exercise awaited us. One time, a blizzard came through at Easter. It blew hard and the drifts were monstrous. When it finally subsided, my brother Brad and I headed out to the side yard along the rock wall. The drifts were utterly amazing. We started digging. The snow was perfect. The outside of the drift was caked together and solid. It held fast as we tunneled into the pillowy insides. We worked for quite a while, scooping and moving snow. Finally, we could both sit inside. We laughed at our good fortune and our lovely handiwork. Our little hangout held fast for several days until it started to warm up a bit and began to melt.
Our faces burn red from the frosty air. When we get inside next to the warm fire that reaches into our muscles and works into our bones in a way like nothing else, our mom will put Bag Balm on our rosy cheeks and our noses so they wouldn’t chafe. We’ll be exceptionally tired out. The kind of tired that feels good though, you know? While we unthaw, we put up our suits, shake off our boots, put everything by the stove so it will dry out. Once warm, we can barely keep our eyes open to eat even though we are starving. We drift off to sleep into one of the very best night’s rest we’ll ever have again.
Peace out there today – Belle
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13 Comments on “Escaping Lyme – Memory #1”
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Beautifully written, dear! Felt like I was there.. Sending love, (((hugs))) and spoons! xo
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Thanks! I hope today is a good one for you! xxoo
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These are good memories.
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What a beautiful memory, Belle! You did such a great job painting the picture. Funny thing is that I’m sitting inside and we have snow in the yard which is completely unusual in Seattle. It’s not thick and fluffy like your memory — but the silence still reigns! Happy Sunday!
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Hi Wynne! Thank you. Wow, it seems like you all have had more snow than normal this year! I have a BF who lives in Everett so kind of your neck of the woods. I hope the snow doesn’t mess up any of your plans this week!
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A lovely image, Belle. Would that silence surround us more in our super electric, industrial age. You’ve made me crave it. Thank you.
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Happy Monday! Thank you for reading! Yes, I miss the quiet as well.
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Belle, I too was amazed and pleasantly bewildered by snow, which of course didn’t affect me the way it did my parents and grandparents who had to get through it to work, get groceries, etc. My grandparents’ property had a huge hill we would go sliding down upon with our “silver circles”…and then trudge back up the hill just to enjoy the thrill of yet another trip down. The fire never felt so warm as when we finally got back inside!
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Hi Bruce! You hit the nail on the head in that the fire always felt so awesome after a good sledding session! Did you have any of the older wood sleds? We had a couple and man those could get going fast!
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We did have those older wood sleds, but the metal discs were the “circle of choice” down this massive hill most of our time was spent upon. Mrs. Chess and I do have an old-school, antique-like wooden sled we still use for an outdoor porch Christmas decoration!
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Like you, I can romanticize the snow of my childhood, but on the other hand, when even a bit of it shows up, I’m a child again. I love it. Thanks for sharing your own wonderful memories of the snow, and for your description of a place I’d love to have lived!
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Hi! I hope you are well. Oh, yes. Whenever we get a whisper of snow here, my husband and I get excited 🙂 He’s a native South Texan so when he gets to experience snow in Colorado where my in-laws live now, he’s ecstatic! Thanks for reading and commenting. I think with this 80 degree weather spring has sprung for us here, don’t you think?
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