Tag: medications

Let’s do the Monster Rash

Hi fellow travelers! Just a thought, if you are interested in even more mundane things I focus on, then please follow me on Twitter @readbtwnthelyme 

First, let me pre-empt the onslaught of my complaining to say I’m Hella Glad it is Summer! I’m not sure I would be able to semi handle this stupid, horrible rash as such if I were actually working. 

So, you may remember this Monster Rash attacking me..YES! Attacking me! in November 2017 with The Damn Rash is Back and again in March 2018 with Rashes, Rashes, We all fall down….. and here we are again. JOY! Now, I did have this similar rash back in April 2016 and June 2016 as well but let’s just keep it as simple as with my muddled brain this is as best I can do right now! Lord! 

In June 2016 I was seen by a dermatologist who declared NO SKIN LUPUS and Excema and sent me on my merry way. No FU. Luckily, I thought the worst was over and did not have another incident until November 2017. This incident in November also started on one side of my face, then tops of hands. It stayed fairly contained, and I was able to treat it with topical creams and OTC allergy meds. I thought I was in the clear.

Again, though, things got really messed up in March 2018. For a scintallating read see Rashes, Rashes, We all fall down….. This same rash began again on my face and proceeded to foremarms, stomach, legs…..my LLMD (let’s loosely use that term at this point!) started me on allergy shots and things blew up again. I was in rash mode almost all of March. It was horrible to say the least. The solution at this time according to my LLMD? was that I have allergies, and I needed to try allergy immunotherapy. I trusted my doctor. After the crazy reaction to the FIRST allergy shot, the vials were diluted, I was given another pack of steroids and sent on my way to find a dermatologist. Needless to say, I stopped the shots and I could not find a dermatologist I could get in to see at this point (all were 3-4 week wait) before the rash cleared up. 

Look, I knew I was looking for trouble now in retrospect. Not on purpose though. Again, I trusted my LLMD and thought, Well since I’m out of school for summer, Maybe I can try to do the allergy shots again? See how it goes? Let’s just say that I’m a DUMBASS. And also that I have learned my lesson not to ever trust my doctor who is pushing a side scheme to have my best interest at heart. Granted, I’ve had this rash before, before doing any allergy shots, but it is my belief that the shots set it off again on a course that has been a dreadful one.

I began doing these shots at home a few weeks ago. Yes, they sent the vials home with me. Yes, I was administering these myself every 3 days. Now, after seeing an allergist (who was shocked and dismayed that this was happening!) I realize that this was a really bad plan. But honestly, I had no idea. I administered my 3rd shot on Tuesday, June 19th. By Saturday evening, I had one red streak under my left eye. I hoped I was wrong, but withing 24 hours, my entire face was swollen, itchy, my eyes were so swollen, the tops of my hands were itching and the rash was moving up my forearms. The Monster Rash was back!

I arrived Monday morning at my doctor’s office as soon as they opened. After telling my tale of the sequence of events, LLMD? stated that in fact, it could not be a reaction to the allergy shots because there was no way I could/would have a reaction 3-4 days after the injection (again, the allergist didn’t seem convinced). I have no idea. I am not a doctor. I recieved a steroid shot along with a 5 day pack of steroids. I was referred to a dermatoligist – again.

While the steroid shot helped my face a bit, I was beyond miserable. The itching continued to spread. I now had spots on my neck, my shoulders, and my ankles. I saw the dermatoligist I was referred to the very next day. She had no idea why I was there. I just assumed since my LLMD? had sent me to her that communication had taken place, but no. I explained about Lyme, FMS, CFS, about the history of this rash, blah, blah, blah. She looked me over. She said maybe atopical excema? But it isn’t all of the time? Maybe contact dermatitis? But again, no new products? Maybe allergies, but still a strange deal? She told me that I am a complex case. Thanks?!

Dermatologist Diagnosis: I DON’T KNOW. COME BACK IN 2 weeks or 2 months…..!!!??? I was prescribed a much higher dose of steroids for 14 days and prescribed steroid cream for both my face and body. 

In the meantime, I had been in contact with my integrative doctor who is located about 4 hours out of town. It was suggested I add a few natural histmine blockers and see an allergist for possible food allergy testing. The days passed, and I was in utter misery. Trying not to itch, trying to have a minute of comfort, trying to figure out what the hell is going on with me? The mega steroids were maybe helping – no new spots – but they also were tearing up my stomach. I kept at it. I finally saw an allergist last Friday.

While the allergist is nice enough, and I am glad to add another decent doctor to my “team”, I honestly don’t know that I am any nearer to figuring out what is causing this rash each time it decides to rear its very ugly head. The allergist also had to have my history, with Lyme becoming a focal point and one for interrogation. That’s never a fun time.

Allergist Diagnosis: Contact dermatitis. Get rid of all products with perfumes. Perfumes and fragrances are what cause 99% of contact dermatitis cases. But doc, I ask, if contact dermatitis then why/how is it all over my face and then also on my legs and arms and…..? Well, doc says, if you are really extra sensitive, it could possibly be spreading without contact at this point. Oh, like a reaction to the orginal spot? Yes? Maybe? I had so many questions but the allergist was done. I was diagnosed and sent off to change out all of my products, to take even more doses of steroids and not much else. Follow-up is in a month assuming no new rash occurs. If it comes back sooner, I go in and we begin allergy testing…….Not sure why we are waiting but……

Monster
Running from the RASH!

I would like to say here that I am not trying to discredit any doctors nor say that I know more that they. Obviously, I don’t AT ALL!!! I believe deep down that each doctor is trying to do his or her best. But as a patient with complex and chronic diseases, sometimes I feel like I am just pushed along. I’m sure all of you have felt this before. It sucks. 

**And hey, if you are still reading – THANK YOU! I promise, my tirade is almost concluded. 🙂

So here I am, day 11 of The Monster Rash (Season 2, episode 6). The steroids are kicking my ass….more like my stomach and my mood. My face is back to normal (win!) and many of the spots are almost gone. I still have a few places where it itches, mostly in the evenings and early mornings. I’m in the process of changing out all products I use that have fragrances and/or perfumes. The big ones are easy like soap, shampoo, laundry soap. But now I keep running into things like hairspray, dishsoap, shaving cream! It’s all a matter of deducing which possible products might have an ingredient I might be allergic to….OMG. It’s all very overwhelming. And all this ASSUMES it is actually contact dermatitis and not something else.

I see my integrative medicine doctor at the end of July. I wish this doctor was closer. Since being in treatment for Lyme, etc. my IM doctor has helped me the most. She’s never actually seen me with the rash during a visit, but she is leaning towards a possible food allergy and/or Mast Cell Activation Syndrome.

I’m going to do what I can on my end. This includes no allergy shots anymore from my LLMD. It also includes my not putting too much faith into this particular doctor anymore. It is what it is. I doubt I will go back to the dermatoligist again. What would be the point? IDK.  I’ll stick to the allergist and see what my IM doctor might have to say about all of this when the times comes.

And of course, I’ll be keeping my fingers crossed The Monster Rash does not return once I finish up the steroids by the end of this week. Please, just no. It’s been exciting and frustrating enough for the time being. 

Thanks for listening! I hope that you and yours have a safe and wonderful Independence Day! – b

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Word Loss

**WARNING – THIS POST IS DEPRESSING. PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU ALREADY FEEL DOWN.

These past 2-3 weeks have not been good for me. I am struggling in every single area of my life: work, personal, mentally, physically. I have not been optimistic in awhile. Between attempting to cope with my cognitive issues, which have become many of late, along with the physical challenges of nausea and body pain, my personal relationships are indeed failing. I can see it happening, but I don’t know what to do to make it stop. Any of it.

I do my best at work. I know my attitude is not always optimal, but I am really trying my hardest. Communication is difficult even on a “good” day. And communication, well that’s kinda “my thing.” It’s something I take great pride in and something I have been good at my entire life. But not now. Although an overused analogy, my brain feels like swiss cheese. I can’t remember regular words such as pliers, consistency or ambiguity when I need these words. My short term memory is almost nil at times. I keep asking co-workers and my husband the same things over and over. I feel like I am slowly going insane. Not being able to remember, not being able to recall basic words while speaking, spelling words incorrectly all of the time is so very frustrating and aggravating. This proceeds to heightening my anxiety and my anger. I imagine that to some degree, this is what is is like to have the onset of Alzheimer’s.

And so, my negative persona and my overall hostility rises. I avoid conversations like the plague. I don’t want to talk because, to myself, I seem to make no sense at all. I imagine that others feel the same when I speak. I am alone. I feel so singularly alone in this.

There is no quick fix, and I get it. I have been very patient and open to any and all treatment over these past two years; I have diligently taken my meds. I do my best to keep my diet in check, I try to stay upbeat and optimistic. I am still working full-time. Yet, I still lose.

I still have the dreaded headaches every day. Joint pain. Every single day. I have made some progress with endurance but I still exhaust quickly. While, I think when in the midst of a migraine and nausea, “this is the worst!” really, the slow decay or what seems like decay of my memory and cognition is ultimately the issues that worry me the most.

For if I can’t use words correctly, beautifully, exacting, then who am I? Always one to rely on my wits and sarcasm, without these, I can’t and won’t ever find my way home, back to who I am. I know, I know. One day at a time. Like the Indigo Girls sing, “We’re sculpted from youth, the chipping away makes me weary.”

Right now, I am weary.

Peace. – B

Back to Bed

Well, all in all, this Thanksgiving break, I have had a decent run of it. But Thursday and today, I am paying for it. It’s 12:30 p.m. on a Saturday; my husband and in-laws are outside working on our new shop and here I lay in bed. We did go to our friends’ house last night for dinner. It was lovely, and I had not seen them since Labor Day weekend! When I am at work that is about all I can manage to do so socializing it not something  can partake of much these days. The evening was nice and I kinda felt normal, and not the “new normal”, the old normal.  🙂

In an offensive move, I played everything safe, too! I took my meds as scheduled, I drank just one glass and a smidge of champagne, I ate more salad than anything else, and I shared a piece of cheesecake with my husband. I know that alcohol and sugar are not great for me but, I promise, the rest of the time, I do a pretty good job of not using either. We were home by 10:30 also!  But then, I could not go to sleep.UGH.

I took my doxepin as soon as we arrived at home. I knew it would take a bit to kick in, then I took lunesta. But for the life of me….I think I finally managed to fall out about 1 a.m. I guess this is part of the reason I feel so horrible today? Damn! Waking up about 6 a.m. to give my Chihuahua Chino his anti-seizure meds, I could barely get out of bed. The bodyaches were everywhere; I basically limped to the kitchen. No worries thought I, I will take a pain med and all will be better. Chino got his meds, and I took mine and headed back to bed. I was finally able to get warm and cozy and doze off for a few more hours. At 9, when I did get up for good today, I was in as much pain all over as I was at 6 a.m. Plus, the headache started its familiar knocking. Moving around as much as possible and having my daily cup of joe, I still could not shake the body pain. It’s one of THOSE days, friends. Uncool.

Struggling and stubbornly, I did some household chores and then headed back to my sanctuary, my sweet bed. But, I am still hurting, and I feel frustrated. Chino and our other Chihuahua, Boo Boo, are on the bed with me sacked out, and I am writing this blog.

Where I am today!
Where I am today!

Can anyone suggest anything to help alleviate the bodyaches and pain? Anything? I have tried an Epsom salt bath, and I have taken a pain med. Both have helped a bit, but I a still having difficulty moving around which is a bit scary, honestly. What are some things you do to at least push back these symptoms and/or take the edge off? Thanks in advance.

Peace, B